I was the skinny kid growing up. I never really had to worry about my weight and it was a real blessing. I love to eat, and while dealing with Carl’s loss, I ate my emotions.

Then, I wake up in August and realized that the heat in San Antonio had gotten so bad I was swelling and well my clothes were not fitting well.

Hmmm, let me think this through, I am eating anything I want and my clothes are getting tighter and tighter. I say this out loud to my coworker and she cracks up. “Sounds like too many tacos!”

It has finally happened. I am now gaining weight and it feels horrible. So, I start thinking about doing what I have never had to do before, exercise. I start to look around at gyms and then someone mentions indoor spin classes.

How hard could this be? I look the website up and then say to myself, this is it, you are indoors, in the dark riding a bike you can do this. So, I commit to it.

I sign up and go by the store to purchase shoes, I figure that if I purchase the shoes I am committed to this for a while. I am anxious but excited to go to my first class. The day comes and I get dressed and head over. Both of my kids wish me luck.

As I arrive I meet the instructor, get set up on the bike and he begins class. He goes over the positions of the bike and I think it’s awesome. Then the class starts. Wait, hold up. Its fast and the instructor’s legs are flying. I am trying to keep up with the pace of the instructor and I am out of breath. As he cues us to go from sitting on the bike to standing up, my feet that are securely attached to the bike in clips, are going way too fast so my left shoe flies off the bike. At this point I am a wreck. The instructor looks over, gets off his bike and is helping me gather my shoe and get clipped back in.....

I am not as good as I thought I would be. I slow down and try and keep up. 50 minutes of this and I am wasted. Like, how do I get home? The class finally ends and I head home. As I walk in the kids look at me. They don’t even say a word. I head to the shower and in this moment, I am so glad I never got rid of the handicap bars in my dad’s shower. I am holding on to get in and out.

I walk into the kitchen and my son says, “You know that is the hardest exercise to do...right?”

No heads up before the class, just a simple comment made after the fact. My muscles hurt so badly, I want to die. I realize that the taco in me was not happy with this at all It was going to be hard work to lose the weight I so easily gained by eating too many tacos.

Oh San Antonio, this will be a bargain for the rest of my life. Spinning turns out to be great after about 15th ride. I realize I can do this and it can be fun. The instructor who helped me with my shoe ends up being one of the nicest people I will meet on this new journey. We will forever laugh about my shoe. And the friends I make are actually becoming the new family I needed. I realize that the 2 things I like the most in the post Carl era, are spinning and eating; it’s all about balance.